NATURE OR NUTURE (16) 02/28/2000 10:00p
Broken arms, back and forth shootings, bookies. This episode brought to you by the letter B and the crime Armed Robbery.

Robber: It’s kind of cold, huh?
Bosco: Yeah, when you get ice that usually means it’s cold outside.
Robber: What kind of scraper you using?
Bosco: A plastic one.

Bosco: How come whenever I’m in a good mood you think it must be related to sex?
Yokas: Because the only time you ever smile at the start of a shift is if you had your bean waxed the night before. I did the math.
Bosco: You know, Yokas, some things are better than sex.
Yokas: You got a fever or something?
Bosco: I’m serious. I’m capable of getting a rush out of other things in life, you know.
Yokas: Like what, sucking on whipped cream cans?

Bosco: I made a really big mistake.
Yokas: What’d you forget to untie Nicole this morning?

Bosco: Faith, I screwed up. Real bad.
Yokas: Oh, don’t tell me. You slept with the Captain’s daughter? Oh, whoops, you already did that.

Bosco: I thought you checked the stalls.
Yokas: I didn’t know you were gonna confess to armed robbery.

{after Carlos stands up Vangie}
Carlos: It wasn’t a date.
Doc: I’m sure she absolutely sees it that way. You got any pets, you better not leave them out at night.

"Nickel"/"Puff Daddy": You got some kind of problem with me?
Doc: No, no. By all means, get shot as much as you like.

Bobby: Treva.
Kim: What kind of name is that?
Bobby: What? It’s worse than Kim?
Kim: What’s wrong with Kim?
Bobby: It’s just Kim. It doesn’t mean anything.
Kim: Yes it does. It’s like a…saint or something.
Bobby: Saint Kimberly? In what religion?

Bosco: I swear to God, if I make it out of this I gotta get like a---
Sully: Lobotomy?

Bosco: I’ll get help, I really will.
Yokas: Therapy. Licensed, able-to-prescribe-medication type therapy.
Bosco: What, like laying on some couch talking about how my mother didn’t potty train me right?

Bosco: You got the smallest bladder of any woman I know.
Yokas: Oh, who are you kidding? If you had to sit down to pee we’d be in there half our shift.

{to Davis}
Sully: If somebody tried to rob you, you’d invite ‘em home for dinner, ask them what went wrong in their family life that could lead them to this horrible place.

Kim: Hey, we gotta talk.
Jimmy: Why is it whenever I’m having a crappy day, you appear and say "we gotta talk"?

{to Nathaniel a.k.a. Puppet}
Doc: How long you think it’s gonna be before we shove you into a body bag?

{Bosco brings the newspaper to the bathroom}
Kim: Why do guys do that? Read on the toilet?
Yokas: I don’t think he actually reads the articles. I think he just looks at the pictures.

Yokas: I look at my kids everyday, I wonder if I’m raising a couple of serial killers.

{to Yokas and Kim}
Bosco: Gab, gab, gab, gab, gab. It never stops, does it?

{about Nathaniel after his little brother dies}
Doc: I don’t care if his ass bleeds to death, he’s not getting in my rig.

{the robbers are in an electronics store}
Bosco: They’ve been in there a really long time.
Yokas: Maybe they’re watching porno on the TVs. You could join them.