HISTORY OF THE WORLD (08) 11/21/1999 8:00p
Everyone is mad. Kim is mad that Jimmy won't be there to spend Thanksgiving with Joey. Bobby is mad that his mom won't invite Matty. Davis is mad that he has to wait as Sully makes a phone call. Sully is mad that Davis made him get off the phone. Bosco is mad because he's being held hostage by a guy named Len. Len is mad because his family sucks. Yokas is mad because Fred is drunk. Fred is mad because Yokas' brother sucks. Being mad is no way to spend a holiday.

{Doc and Carlos "checking out the action"}
Carlos: Put shoes on ‘em, stockings.
Doc: Take the stockings off, too.
Carlos: Is that you talking?

Carlos: You wear the ring. It’s not exactly a babe magnet.
Doc: Well, I don’t want to be a "babe magnet." I’ll leave that to you.

{they are on the phone}
Yokas: Are you going to be all right without me?
Bosco: One day? I think I can handle it.
Yokas: Yeah, well you still sleep with the light on.

{to Bosco over the phone}
Yokas: My brother and my husband at the same table. I’d probably see less action out on the streets with you.

{about the wine that Stanley brought}
Fred: You forgot to take the price off, Stanley. Just like last time. Cost about as much as our car.

{to Bobby}
Matty: First rule of lying little brother, look like you mean it.

{to Stanley}
Yokas: Whatever you think of me, whatever you think of Fred, he is my husband and you forget that and I don’t want you back here.

{to Leonard’s family}
Bosco: Help the waiter out or I’ll shoot you myself.
O(60 KB)

Leonard: Do you think it happened this way with the Pilgrims?
Bosco: Yep.

Sully: All we got out there is each other.
Davis: I won’t perjure myself. Excuse me.
Sully: I’d do it for you.
Davis: I guess I’m just not the man you are, Sully.

Joey: Mommy said you weren’t gonna come.
Jimmy: Well, you see, Mommy doesn’t know everything.

Bobby: You know what I think? History of the world--- there’s no such thing as a normal family.
O(300 KB)

Yokas: …they passed out. Which I’m surprised you didn’t considering what you did to Johnny Walker.
Fred: Kicked his ass.

Maggie Davis: I was a cop’s wife. I’m used to the crazy hours.

Sully: Can you remember a time when Tyrone maybe did something he thought was wrong or… anyways, he wasn’t sure it was right and---
Maggie Davis: So he had to call somebody, wake ‘em up out of bed, get ‘em to come over and talk to him?